There Is Nothing Binarist About Only Being Attracted To Binary Genders

As I was looking through queer blogs while trying to plan out my bisexual post yesterday, I once again had my attention drawn to just how much biphobia exists within so-called "LGBTQ-friendly" spaces. And 90% of the time, this hate is excused by accusing bisexuals of being "binarist". Convenient - you can cover up your oppression of bisexuals by derailing and saying "I'm doing it from trans* rights! All those mean bisexuals oppress trans people anyway just by their existence!"

In case you aren't familiar with the term "binarism", it's used within the context of gender to refer to the idea that there are only two genders. Now, there is quite a lot of binarism from people. But I have come to get seriously suspicious any time someone uses that word, because in my experience, that word has been used as an excuse to hate on and shame bisexuals.

The (failed) logic behind bigots who say that bisexual=binarist is apparently that the prefix bi- is used to indicate "two" of something, and somehow people make the leap from that to "ZOMG BISEXUALS THINK THERE ARE ONLY TWO GENDERS!!111"

But here's the thing...that's not how it works.

For one important thing, not all bisexuals are only attracted to binary genders. Quite a few are attracted to those outside the gender binary. "Bisexual" does not, in fact, mean "men and women" - it can also mean "genders different from myself as well as my own gender". For example, a genderqueer person could be bisexual, being attracted to both genderqueer people and non-genderqueer people.

But here's where my anger really lies. When bisexuals have to defend themselves from this hate, most of them default to the explanation above - that bisexuality does not just mean attraction to only men and women. They're so desperate to get away from the assumption that they're only attracted to men and women.

Yeah, here's the thing: There is nothing wrong with only being attracted to the binary genders.


It's that simple. If you think there's something wrong with it, then get a clue: You are biphobic. Don't try to spew some bullshit about "but...but...binarism!" or how we're inherently oppressing non-binary people with our existence. You can't hide bigotry under the guise of activism.

There is a complete double standard here with who non-bisexual people accuse of "oppression". Lesbians are only attracted to women - why don't you accuse them of oppressing everyone who's not a woman? Hell, if asexuals are attracted to no one, why don't you accuse them of oppressing everyone?

So please, stop with implying that there is anything wrong with only being attracted to two binary genders. It's biphobic, plain and simple. (And hey, fellow bisexuals: Next time someone makes the binarism argument, could you maybe take a moment to mention that some bisexuals are only attracted to the binary genders, and that's okay? Thanks.)

(If you'd like to see three of the posts that made me angry enough to inspire this, go here, here, and here.) But be warned: MASSIVE biphobia and ignorance abound.